After hitting my head against the proverbial wall, and running ahead of God, I finally decided to listen. After attending a conference in February of 2017, I knew I was to pull back on all writing; and in June of 2017, I remember hearing that it was time to put my pen up for a season. I didn’t know what the reason was, but I knew that I wanted to obey this time.
2017 has held a season that neither my husband nor I thought we’d walk through. It has drawn us closer together as a couple, and has taught us to dig down deep and stand in faith and walk in obedience. In September, I quit my job. In prayer, it was revealed to my husband and I that I would stay home and see what He would have me do.
It’s been a season of healing, a season of learning, and a true season of rest. I have faced many issues that I didn’t realize I was still dealing with. I’ve learned that, instead of waiting to hear “okay, now go,” I ran ahead of God as soon as He gave me the next step. There was fruit, but it was more forced fruit than anything. I will be honest and say that my first devotional book, “Submerged” was a result of me running ahead of God. Truthfully, I don’t really promote it anymore, because it’s a reminder of moving before Him. Looking back, I see the reason why He would have me put my pen down.
This isn’t a post to drum up encouragement, or “I didn’t notice,” it’s a post to show you where I’ve been—and where I’m going.
I’ve seen a change in many areas of my life, which makes me nervous to start again. I don’t want to be where I once was. But, I believe I’ve been called, and I’m not going to squelch the flame—I’m going to kindle it until it’s a roaring fire. Do I have it all figured out? By all means, no. I am still learning as I walk this road, and I still have moments where I run ahead a little bit. But I have learned that it’s no fun to run ahead, because I can’t see where the road curves ahead, or if there’s a dead end. But this journey will be day by day, moment by moment; and it’ll be real and raw. So stick with me. Grab a cup of coffee and join me at the table with your bible and pen in hand.
Thank you for extending grace, thank you for supporting, and thank you for coming back.