My dad and I, with my husband on my team, are training a yearling colt to lead and eventually ride. As part of the training, the colt will be tied to a well-set post, ironically named a “patience post,” so that he can learn to stand. It’s a harmless post that will allow him to move in circles without hurting himself. He may react by pawing, snorting, running in circles or pulling back. After time, he learns to stand patiently.
In September 2017, my husband and I were called away from the church we had been attending. I also stepped away from my job there. In praying, we decided that I would stay at home and do as the Lord asked me to do. What I didn’t realize was that this would be the start of my own “Patience Post” season.
At my “patience post,” The Lord has been addressing hidden issues that are tied to impatience by asking me to stand and wait for Him. He is my “patience pole,” if you will. Instead of being able to run the opposite direction from what He is asking me to do and deal with, He is rooting me to Himself and lavishing me with love and grace.
I have known that God loves me, but that knowledge had not made it to my heart until recently. Standing at the “patience post,” I’ve seen the character of God revealed in my life. I have seen the constant Source of Who He is in my life. But, it hasn’t come without protest on my part.
I am constantly in motion, because if I stand still, my mind wanders to “what ifs.” Before, I didn’t want to face the whole of what was in my heart. I prayed often “Lord remove what doesn’t belong,” but I hardly stuck around after that prayer to let Him work in me. The motive of my heart was not something I wanted exposed. I didn’t want the door open and my insecurities to fall out. What I didn’t realize is that He wasn’t asking them to be exposed to the world, but to Him so that He could take them and wash His word over them. Somewhere along the way, fear had gripped me like a child grips the hand of their mother so as not to get lost. I had to face fear, because I couldn’t run. I had to silence the worries and concerns of my not controlling everything. Just the other day, I realized I hadn’t battled fear in awhile, and I felt as if the Lord said “It’s because you have recognized My presence and have spent time in my word. You have allowed My love to cast it out.”
I’ve come to the end of me this season. The church we’ve started attending has been a church where healing my bruised and tattered heart has finally began. Over and over I have heard the words, “I love you” reverberate my entire being. Standing at this patience post, He’s not only addressed hidden issues, but He’s lavished a lesson of who I am in Christ. He’s unraveled where my identity has been in other things instead of Him.
There are times where I want to rear back, but like a yearling learns that they can’t go anywhere tied to that post, I’ve learned that God isn’t going to go anywhere. And uncannily enough, that makes me want to stay put.
So maybe you’re at your own “patience post.” Can I encourage you to quit stomping, pawing, snorting or running and just be still?
James encourages us in 1:4
But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing
Being patient and allowing the Lord to complete a work in us will prepared us to go higher in our relationship with the Lord. I can tell you that allowing Him to deal with things now, makes it than dealing with it in the wilderness.
It is such a beautiful work the Lord does when we stand still. A transition of the heart from worldly passions to the desire for Him.